Monday, January 12, 2009

Why are Canadians dumb?

Just look at the climate we live in.....

It's currently -29 Celcius, and it's supposed to go down to -34 tonight. Great.

To top it all of, I have a piece of shit 1993 Cavalier that decided that I don't deserve heat any longer.
This is just one of the many "features" my car has. It's other selling points are a defrost that hardly does it's job, and a rear defrost that lasts as long as a 15 year old boy looking at a Playboy magazine.

So, needless to say, I'm at my wits end. I'm thinking of calling my grandma to see if I can borrow her car for the next few months. This is, of course, if I can pry it out of my greedy aunts/cousins hands long enough to get it out of the driveway.
This is the same car that Ali and I borrowed after her beloved 'Tunia (R.I.P) was stolen a few years back.
The only difference - if we borrow it, we wash it, put gas in it, clean it, and show our appreciation by getting her flowers and a thank you card. All my asshole family does is drive it until it's empty, and add a few new dents and scratches every time they get behind the wheel.

Tough choice?

If any of you have an inexpensive vehicle to donate to Chris' work fund, let me know. I'll get you as many rubber gloves and suppositories as you can handle.

3 comments:

Chief Rock Chef said...

I don't have a car to lend you, but I might be able to find you a nice bicyle!

But you can hold on the payment, thanks...

Wreggie said...

Temping offer but you would freeze in the Jeep while your feet cooked.

My hat is off to you northern outpost folks.

Canada ought to work a deal with one of our southern states and just move Winnipeg. I think the French Canadians did it with New Orleans to make Cajuns.

Jay Gray said...

You could get a new job.

Australia offers 'best job in world' on paradise island

AFP/File – An Australian state is offering internationally what it calls "the best job in the world" -- …
SYDNEY (AFP) – An Australian state is offering internationally what it calls "the best job in the world" -- earning a top salary for lazing around a beautiful tropical island for six months.

The job pays 150,000 Australian dollars (105,000 US dollars) and includes free airfares from the winner's home country to Hamilton Island on the Great Barrier Reef, Queensland's state government announced on Tuesday.

In return, the "island caretaker" will be expected to stroll the white sands, snorkel the reef, take care of "a few minor tasks" -- and report to a global audience via weekly blogs, photo diaries and video updates.

The successful applicant, who will stay rent-free in a three-bedroom beach home complete with plunge pool and golf buggy, must be a good swimmer, excellent communicator and be able to speak and write English.

"They'll also have to talk to media from time to time about what they're doing so they can't be too shy and they'll have to love the sea, the sun, the outdoors," said acting state Premier Paul Lucas.

"The fact that they will be paid to explore the islands of the Great Barrier Reef, swim, snorkel and generally live the Queensland lifestyle makes this undoubtedly the best job in the world."

Lucas said the campaign was part of a drive to protect the state's 18 billion Australian dollar a year tourism industry during the tough economic climate caused by the global financial meltdown.